You Gotta Love Me :-)

U kno it’s us against the world!

Jus gotta express now! At my breaking point :-(

How is it that I can maintain a smile every time I step foot outside when nothing has ever went right in my life. Why do I work so hard to be so unhappy at 18!? Working 2/3 jobs my whole life ever since I was 14 to receive nothing in return beside stress heart ache and a sore body! Parents r both dushbags and dont understand how much hurt I feel because I never had a real family who I can say I truly love. I have worked my ass off throughout school and work-never failed a class never went to summer school never got fired from a job never sat on my ass and ate up my parents money nothing ever and what do I get in return a mother who stresses me more who’s broke and a broke ass father who promises the world but never gives it to me! Yes of course there are happy moment but all the sadness of my broken heart always captures those happy split second moments. Why I feel as if I always fall in love soo quick to keep being hurt! I love my bf so much I never had a man treat me they way he does but I just can’t take all that we go thru I feel as if I already know how it’s gonna end cuz we go thru the same shit over and over again and it hurts that every time we speak it gets blown outta proportion and hurts me soo much! I don’t want a man I feel I love and the one who can be the one go down the drain. If I loose him I feel like I’m nothing how am I gonna love again from being Hurt so many time-all I want is love in return from somebody. One day I want someone to take care of me for once instead of me breaking my body down just to take care of me half the way! I will always be independent but I do need a back bone. Some one just show me some love make me feel happy and worth living again make me wanna be here.

If it wasn’t for friends I dout I would even b here at 18 years old just because I feel the love from them even tho my heart has been hurt by certain ppl I gave my life to and swore that if u was bout to get shot I would prob jump in a save u n get shot for u but u would never do the same for me which I swore up and down u would so now that whole idea is gone imma let u get shot! But my bows and reckless and all the other people I can say r wonderful ppl which is only a handful really saved me because I don’t hurt with them. Don’t wanna be dramatic but there’s just so much build up and it will never go away these imagines and my perspective on everything will always be the same! I guess imma just be bitter inside and remain smiling for the public

Deff how I am feeling right now -can’t do this by k. Michelle

I know I love you and I care about you but you keep hurting me and I keep forgiving you I just can’t do this boy I just can’t do this

But Im so afraid to walk away from you I don’t know what you want me to do

Chorus: Know I love you and I care about you but you keep hurting me and I keep forgiving you I just can’t do this boy I just can’t do this Don’t wanna lose you Need you in my life But your not giving back, Why the sacrifice I just can’t do this boy I just can’t do this

Verse: Now I take your cursing your drinking and even flirting Smile for the camera when I’m really hurting Everyday you make me feel it for certain No matter what I do it just ain’t working (I had enough of this) I’m always pleasing you (Boy did you forget) That I got needs too

Verse: Say you used to be my sunshine in the midst of the rain And you used to ease my mind when my heart was in pain I was the hand and you were my glove Tell me what did you do with the man that I loved You used to make me feel that I can fly now all I wanna do is lay down and die

Chorus: Know I love you and I care about you but you keep hurting me and I keep forgiving you I just can’t do this boy I just can’t do this Don’t wanna lose you Need you in my life But your not giving back, Why the sacrifice I just can’t do this boy I just can’t do this

I can’t I won’t I can’t I won’t I can’t I won’t I can’t I won’t